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Health - Tip of the Month
For years the thought of meditating seemed rather stressful to me even though it should be something that relieves stress rather than causes it. I've taken classes, studied briefly at retreats and listened to tapes and yet it continued to feel daunting. Somehow I wasn't ever doing it 'quite right'. I would find a place to sit and try my best to free my mind of all thoughts and yet they would race in. I would get frustrated. I would tell myself that all I had to do was sit for a long enough period of time and it would happen. I found myself constantly looking at a clock. I would tell myself that I must do it daily and, when I failed, would beat myself up about it. No matter what I did it just never seemed to work.
Over the years I started to get a better sense of what meditation is to me and how to best practice it based on who I am. Here's what I have learned:
- Meditation is space. Between every thought we have is a small space and meditation is about increasing the amount of that space.
- It is incredibly difficult to do this.
- It takes practice and forgiveness.
- For someone like me who has a difficult time sitting still, it is necessary to have something to focus on.
- Some people like to focus on their breath and others like to focus on a mantra.
- In addition to just focusing on something, my body needs to be moving. Therefore I have some prayer beads and when I say my mantra I move those beads, one at a time.
- Having a space dedicated to this practice is important.
- Doing it at a specific time of day, like first thing in the morning, is best.
After figuring all this out, I still found myself not being very accomplished at meditating regularly. It seemed that there was still a piece missing. Well I found that piece when I went to Bhutan.
I was traveling with a handsome young Bhutanese guide who seemed to know an incredible amount about Buddhism and yet he was 'very cool' if you will. One day during our travels I asked him if he meditated. He responded with a resounding 'Of course!' Being the person I am I said, 'do you mediate daily?' Again I got the 'Of course!' answer. 'For how long?' I asked. His answer was the piece that had been missing for me. He simply said, 'for however much time I have.'
That answer gave me the permission I needed. Since that trip, which was about 5 years ago now, I meditate or 'sit' as I call it most mornings. I don't set a timer or look at a clock. I don't worry if my mind can only be free of thoughts for a nanosecond. I simply do the best I can and I have to say that I have seen that 'space' increase over the years, even if it is miniscule. Most importantly I feel that it has made me a better person whether that is because I can handle stressful times better or because I've allowed myself the space to just be the best I can in that moment. Whatever it is, I am grateful for the experience and feel I will carry it forward throughout the rest of my life.
I hope this is has been helpful to you and encourages you to try to find your own personal type of meditation!
I always love to hear other peoples experiences so if you would like to share yours, please email me!
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